Self- Discovery Journal Prompt #1

What is something that has been on your mind lately ?

It isn’t new that i tend to enjoy a drink here and there, however lately it has felt unnecessary to drink. I have always had a habit of thinking any free time I have needs to be spent being productive. Wether that be distracting myself with work or drugs. It could be because growing up my family made me feel like I wouldn’t do enough. It could be that my last relationship made me feel like i couldn’t do enough. Whatever toxin I took, it was to put me in a state of mind where its just me and my thoughts. Even then it seems like work trying to sort through thoughts and feeling that never seem to come to an end.

It’s gotten to the point where I can’t seem to unwind unless my conscious mind is not fully there. I feel the need to be in a type of daze. Well up until recently. Now, it feels like a waste of time. There isn’t enough time in the day to accomplish things I want to accomplish. I have said that drinking is one of the thing keeping me from my own peace of mind. It isn’t. Yet I started to yearn the day I don’t need substances to be content with myself.